I make decisions from the first conscious moment that I have in the morning. Do I hit the snooze button today? Should I weigh myself this morning? Do I want to make coffee at home or stop by a Starbucks? Which Converses do I want to wear today? How many meals do I need to take with me to work? What time will I head to the gym for my Future Ms. Olympia Training? Can I really do that? Be Ms. Figure Olympia? What do I want to be doing when I’m 35? 50? What will I have accomplished by then? What is my purpose in life? What the hell am I doing with my life?
This is the first ten minutes of my morning. Every. Single. Day. I’m usually so out of it when I wake up that all I can do is form thoughts as my body comes to life. In my sleepy state, I begin imagining and visualizing about my real dreams. The ones that consume 80% of my thoughts 100% of my day, and my nights. While I’m brushing my teeth I repeat lists of things that are going right, and how awesome my life is. As I look in the mirror I remind myself of all of the things I like about my body. As I do my makeup I think about how lucky I am to have my friends and family, and the relationships I’ve built with people. After I spiral out the door with my Tupperware and gym clothes in hand, I jump in my car, and put on a song that fits. I spend my entire ride to work getting pumped up and excited…all before 9am.
I’ve been practicing this for over 4 years now.
I can’t remember the last time I’ve had a bad day.
Coincidence? I don’t think so. I think that I just started deciding to start my day off right, and create it from the beginning. I’ve decided to take control…and decision changes everything.
There is a certain responsibility in making a decision. If you make the wrong one, you pay the consequences. If your decision is fantastic, you get to revel in the reward. You have to become a formulated gambler. Do you realize just how much power is in decision-making? Think about what all has become of this world, just from the decisions of human beings. I consider myself a fortunate person to have developed the courage to make my own decisions, and stand by them. I chose to graduate college. I chose not to move across the country and stay close to my family. I chose to quit my job and create my own business. I chose to quit screwing around, to start sacrificing, and go after my Pro card on a serious level. I’ve chosen to become very honest myself about what I really want, and what I’m going to do about it. These have been some of the heaviest, most intimidating, and best decisions I’ve ever made in my young life. The common denominator of all of these choices is my fear of failure. What if things don’t work out? My bigger fear, is settling. What if there is something better for me out there? And my biggest fear? Succeeding. If I have the power to do the unthinkable, what in this world can’t I do?
At the close of each year, I hear other people say “My New Year’s resolution is to ___________.” I have a problem with the declaration of New Year’s Resolutions. I have a few of them actually. I know this may come off as negative, but I do have my reasons. Firstly, I do not understand why anyone should limit themselves in their ability to take control of their lives, by a yearly tradition. I see it as a way of passing off responsibility until the last minute, which adds up to so many missed opportunities to create what they want. Another issue that I have is the various attitudes toward New Year’s Resolutions. A common tone that I hear makes it sound like a burden. Something a person is “supposed’ to do, or “has” to do. In my eyes, you get to do this. It is an opportunity to be grateful for. If you want to do something, just start. If you want to quit something, then simply stop doing it. Yes, of course it is difficult, and it takes practice. But so did everything else that we’ve become good at. The other issue that I have is the lack of action and commitment. When I hear someone say something they want to change, my immediate response is “Good. Now tell me what you are going to do about it.” More often than not, I hear retraction and doubt of the very statement that they just said. I also think that generally, people misunderstand the definition of the word. A resolution is not just an idea or a few words. It is defined as “a decision or determination: to make a firm resolution to do something.” Your decision is the initial spark. Your action is what adds fuel to the fire….you may start smoke with frail leaves but it will never turn into a fire without actual substance. Your commitment is the constant energy that you continue to feed…..the oxygen…the wood…the coal. At first you may have a few glowing low coals that warm your cheeks. There is a flicker of light, a few cracks and pops, but without something bigger, that young flame can smolder for a long time, or even suffocate to its death. To Nothing. Not even enough to warm your hands on. Just a lifeless grey ash that is so weak, even the slightest movement of air will carry it to the abyss. It’s lost. If you want to keep that fire alive, you have to give. You have to pile it on. You have to breathe life into it. You have to throw the logs to feed its strength. Go ahead and pour gasoline on that son-of-a-bitch . You have to create combustion. An uncontrollable blaze so magnificent that even you have to stand at a distance in amazement and think “I did that. I created that.”
Each day that you take control of your decisions is that much longer that you get to enjoy the life that you’ve always wanted. A year’s worth of waiting is too long. Practice it today. Make a decision, and stand by it. It’s as simple as that.